Date : Monday, November 2, 2009
Time : 6:52 AM
Title : the end

1 november 2009

we were talking on the phone.
i treat him lyk always.. but then just a lil bit of my self showed!
he noticed and me too...
after half and hour talking,
he send me an sms ...

"why wont you say 'i love you' anymore?"

im blurred! idk wether i should
tell him the truth or lied to myself again..
and ... the ugly truth is shown..
im shaking but at the same time i felt a thousand of relief!
ive never been this honest about my feeling to him..
idk how should i react, i will go with the flow..
but then
he send me an sms again,

"we're done"

i cried! .. confused!
is this the right decision??!?!?
oh God please tell me what should i do.
i lost the person that love me and care for me.
i take the risks to be with someone that i like.
is this the best decision??..
or im just ruined with my chance to be happy?. i dont know.
not even a clue.
im just following my heart.

i asked him.. wether he is serious or not..
then he answered...

"Am i serious? ofcourse i am. Look,
im really tired of this thing happening
again and again. so, harap kamu faham.
Thx for the love u gave me anyway.
Bye."

once again, i felt empty
the emptiness that have to be fulfilled
arghhh.. more blurred!
i cried cried and cried..
do i make the right decision?
im questioning myself over and over and over again
im exhausted..

is this the end of everything? or just a beginning to a new thing?
we will see..